Obviously, I have been bad, bad, bad the past few weeks. I haven't been posting, which is a huge part of keeping me accountable. I have eaten what I wanted for the most part. Drank what I wanted, and gained about 5 lbs in the process. I am struggling to find motivation right now, and when I start to not care, I just want to eat. I keep telling myself, I will start again on Monday. Then Monday rolls around and I change that to Tuesday, and so far the day hasn't come. I know that I am still a long way from goal, and I want to get there. I just don't want to have to do the work. Another aspect of my personality I loathe.
I get gung ho about something, I fly high for a while, I am always very successful, then I lose motivation and I crash and burn. I don't want to do that this time. I know there will be hills as part of this journey and I just need to get up and start walking for the top if I want to see the other side. Even if it is slow, which it has been, it is worth it. I am typing that right now, not even sure if I believe it myself. The other half of me just wants to go for broke and say *&%$ it! But I guess what they say is true. Life is less about the destination and more about the journey. I have learned so much about myself through this. And I know I CAN do it, and I know I WANT to do it, now all I have to do is DO it.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
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